Suyin Aerts
July 20, 2018

Some decisions are forever, …

...but a lot of decisions are just a step towards a happy life. It is important to make decisions and you have to accept you are never sure about any decision whether it will be the correct decisions until you make it and life it. But not taking a decision is the worst decision :-) For me only one decision I made in my life was really forever until now: and that is making children and more importantly the man I made my children with. Because he will always be the father of my girls, so that is a decision you better think twice before making it. And I am lucky as I am still very happy with that decision a made. I have wonderful girls and my partner is an excellent father, and yes he is still an excellent partner in life and in business, so I am double lucky. Most young people make critical decisions about their future lives and careers based on factors that they assume will give them some sense of predictability. Similarly, many adults strive for financial freedom, so they don’t have to think about money as something that deters them from fully controlling their lives. If we didn’t have this orientation and if we didn’t have a solid foundation, we’d be continuously exposed to chaos and uncertainty, and we would have a much harder time feeling grounded and safe. There is a state of striving where we are moving and working towards a goal. And then there is a state of accomplishment after having achieved said goal, thus achieving a form of stability.

When we are striving — which is most of the time — we are in a state of instability. When we accomplish something, we gain ourselves stability. That’s how most of us intuitively think and feel about this process.


Except, that’s not how it really works. The paradox is that achieving a goal is what leads to instability, whereas the state of striving provides stability.

Naturally, no matter what the system, too much volatility can itself be harmful. Having some sort of a foundation is necessary. Humans need some foundation of achievement, and we obviously need many of our basic needs met in order to have a shot at contentment. Getting some of the things we want is healthy and important.

It’s easy to see how not having enough can be an issue, but it’s even easier to overlook how getting what you want might be similarly problematic.

"Sometimes, what you don’t have is just as important as what you do have"

Keep on striving, keep on dreaming, keep on reaching goals and find new ones! Handtekening Suyin (1)
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