Suyin Aerts
April 16, 2021

An interesting question

This week in the car coming back from a hockey camp with the girls I asked them what they would chose as a study in case we get a phone call that they could go to University earlier than foreseen, so at the age of 13 and 14. The oldest one immediately said Biology and the youngest one was as fast with her respons and said I want to become an Engineering Architect.
But what about you mummy: “what would you study if you had to decide again?”

I was surprised that I did not had to think that long to be able to provide them with an answer. I said I would study Journalism. Maybe the fact that I am watching the amazing series “Borgen” at the moment is in it for a little bit, but I could have said Politics, as the main characters in the series are a Journalist and a Politician.

It made me think again about that teacher I had when I was about their age, he was a Journalist that went to the Golf War, he was our teacher of Morals in High School. A great guy that inspired me a lot. When I had to make a decision on what we would study, I remember that I was pushed a lot by the mathematics teacher and the sciences teachers to go for a study as a civil engineer. But in the month of August, during summer holidays I decided to change the plans and not to go to University yet.
I decided to become a professional dancer.

I was combining studies and top sports at that moment for about 4 years. Looking back I realize I only had the age my daughters have now, when I started this challenging combination of school and sports every day. Heavy schedule, loads of planning, focus, no parties, not hanging around and having fun with friends. Not such a things as a free weekend. The only thing I continued doing was reading books, mostly on the bus on the way back home, late at night but only when school work was finished.

Do not get me wrong I do not regret at all, I first went for the career in the somewhat uncertain world of dance. A though world, a world that asks a lot of discipline, a lot of perseverance. You need to have a healthy life style and it is a world with a lot of competition. It was very hard to make real friends.

But it was only during my next job as an actress for television that I completely lost my believe in friendship. I will never, ever forget that moment I told my best friend about the casting I was asked for.
We were colleagues before, we became friends, or at least that was what I believed, but than the series we worked for stopped and we were both asked for different castings. I still wonder why I told her about the fact that they asked me, she was not asked, but she picked up her phone I guess, never told me she was going to audition as well.

She got the role and my acting career was over….(or at least for the time being, as I would love to act again, not on a stage but on a film set)
But more importantly the friendship was over and I never understood why. I think she was feeling bad of not having informed me about the reality,….

My believe of friendship got a crack forever.

However yesterday I told my husband, that I was so happy that “at last” I got female friends again.

I just hope that if you also had a bad experience with being cheated on by a friend that you ask yourself the right question. Maybe that was not your best friend, but please never give up on friendship as it is one of the most beautiful things in life.

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